Write_Stuff_Poetry

Forbidden Mention What causes your family to bury the past? To hide from the truth, don’t want it to last Is it better to bury the problems of old? I found out its lies I have always been told. I wondered what the whispering was all about It sent chills up my spine~ I wanted to shout Curiosity left me uneasy and scared I knew there was something that should have been shared. Now turn the clock forward, this mess I must fix The damage is done; I am scarred by the mix The secrets are buried so deep in the ground Is there hope that my history can someday be unbound? I was raised in a family so bound by abuse There were such evil things that were unspoken, obtuse We lived in a dungeon without any key As children we just had no option to flee. The secrets were buried, or so they did think I vow to disclose all these stories in ink These demons, they need to be torn from my life No more generations will carry this strife. If your life has been stable, with love and support Don’t pretend that

Look Right Through Me I looked in your eyes, and what did I see That clearly you were not thinking ‘bout me What is it about me, I really must ask That makes you look past me, like I wear a mask You know you can trust me That your confidence I’ll keep I am always loyal, faithful to friends That’s where it stops, yes, that’s where it ends I never saw this coming, though In fact, I don’t even want you to know So why am I feeling this, what did I see I felt like we had a sweet chemistry I can’t even mention this-feel like a fool I know I can’t do it, which just isn’t cool I put feelings to paper to shelter my heart I have to protect me, I have to be smart I find it amazing that I’m here to write To mention my feelings, these feelings I fight It seems pretty silly, the way that I feel So, silly in fact, perhaps it’s not real? Just what am I thinking- I’m sharing my heart To people unlikely- that isn’t too smart I’m sure in the long run

IF I EVER UNDERSTOOD As I close out my fiftieth year So many things I used to fear Have given way to joy, not sorrow And promise of a new tomorrow I’ve come to see that there are things That being over fifty brings Like memories made out of solid gold That sooth my heart and can’t be sold I know they say you can’t look back To find the things you may have lacked It’s when we set up limitations That looking back can’t cause elations Don’t ever look at the number you are Unless you think you’re not a star Those people who come from your past Contribute to the YOU that lasts Each person somehow left a mark And sometimes even there’s a spark Don’t wait to speak, don’t wait to share Don’t wait to tell them that you care My eyes have opened very wide To what I missed and why I hide I will not miss another day To say the things I NEED to say! Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright September 2009

30 August 2009 Today, in 1924, a baby was born This child grew up to be my Daddy Today he would be 85 years old..... If I do the math, that means he has been gone for almost 22 years Don't wait until tomorrow......because tomorrow is never promised Do you tell your family and friends that you love them? It seems "wierd" to still be grieving after 22 years I know what Elizabeth Kubler Ross says There are stages of grief And they all have their time and place But, I found out that being "strong" and "tough" about grief, It does not go away into oblivion~and "stuffing" your feelings Can only destroy you, make you run scared Because when you lose the one person in your life who believed in you You forget who you were..who you are.... And even being 50 years old, you feel like a child who just lost her favorite toy We all have to face those losses~throughout our lives nothing is guaranteed What we can guarante

In the stillness of the morning I think about my day Put my thoughts and words together And to Jesus I do pray Before I turn the lights on Put the coffee on to brew I ask the Lord to guide me, What he’d like to see me do To make this world a better place To help my fellow man He put me here to do these things I know this is His plan As the sun begins to rise I feel joy within my heart Having Jesus there to light my way He can show me where to start. Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 1998

Unlock the Peace Within Look within yourself And you will see To find the peace you crave You will need to have a key The key is not made Out of iron or of brass But rather, it’s of something Your heart cannot surpass To find a real peace Hold your hand upon your heart If it feels steady and certain You know you’ve made the right start. For peace begins inside you When you life your life each day With a feeling God has touched your heart In each and every way. Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 1998

2 Corinthians 12:7-10 (New King James Version) The Thorn in the Flesh 7 And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. 8 Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. 9 And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Repentance Don’t do it for me- to undo your guilt This issue is bigger than milk that has spilled To devote all your life to our Savior and Lord A word that cannot be confessed is “I’m bored” For boredom attracts the devils attention And Jesus gets not even an honorable mention We are told in His wisdom to work for his cause That words without action won’t get His applause As I avoid conflict that crushes my heart I walk in the spirit with Jesus impart Don’t follow me now, because I will not lead I know that my job was to nurture a seed The seed was meant to promote and to grow To God it appeared you had so much to show He entrusted me with a challenge to exception And I gave it my all even though it was deception Why is it I’m still hurting long after it’s through Because it was ALL OF ME that I gave to you I committed to doing the job I was asked ‘Cause it is my will to do all of His tasks Oh Lord, can you see me behin

Spiritual Maturity  I thank you, oh Lord for each breath that I take  For lessons I learned when mistakes I did make  I thank you for giving me the spirit to live  And allowing me the honor of wanting to give  This level of spirit to nurture you gave me  To understand life and how humans forsake Thee  I stand up for righteousness in all loads we bear  I even desire people to follow through with care  I am finding that people don’t follow the way  I find that they don’t follow through in what they say  I pray that they realize their actions impact  And hope that with Jesus it isn’t an act  To say you’re a follower of His Holy word  But don’t follow through on the words that are heard  Is Jesus not present in the life that you hurt  Would you make an excuse to Him to alert  That something came up, and the plans now have changed  Do your words and your actions seem all rearranged?  When you dishonor a brother, you dishonor our God  Y

I went to visit my daddy today I talked, he listened.... in fact, these days, all he does is listen I spoke about Elizabeth's first day of college tomorrow I told him that I missed him~my best friend I told him that I am not giving into this affliction And that I found a keyboard for $20 at a rummage sale And that whenever I play Fuer Elise, I play it for him Because he always liked that song when I played it Even though he can no longer talk to me I hear his spirit whisper to me He is ok where he is at~ a PEACEFUL place Different than on the Earth He reminded me that this loneliness for him Will surrender itself when we meet again one day. Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright August 2009

Happy~Ness What does it take to be Happy, I believe That each person needs Their own heart to perceive What levels of trust, and Of faith, and of love Can take them to that Place that’s above. Happiness comes in all Shapes and all forms You find it in sunshine And sometimes in storms But it can only be you That can truly define When you grasp on to happiness And say that it’s mine! Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 1998

Discovery Whispering illusions Beckon my mind Captivate a part of me I’ve been trying to find As I see The past unfold By spirit, by actions By kindness untold. Waves of delight The soul to refresh Comforting images of time Will unmesh The search will be satisfied The emptiness filled Enrapture the soul That won’t be denied. ~Vickie Skowronski Copyright August 1994

Oh, Gentle Heart When I looked into your eyes That Monday back in May I saw the stars that light your soul That very special day. I saw each chance as special Each chance you took me to That place where I could be myself And feel so peaceful next to you. As days passed by my heart would flutter At the thought I’d see your face I longed to see those stars again To journey to that place. Your gentle nature touched my heart It left me wanting more To open up your soul to me Was something to adore. I consider myself so lucky That you’ve touched my heart so deep I will treasure you in the palm of my hand Even when I sleep! Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 1998

SUCCESS Cannot success be described as something from within each one of us, a personal checklist of our goals; the degree of importance we set our attributes, our accomplishments? What is important to me will make me successful. Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 1986

Stand By Me, Time ~ An Ode to A Custody Battle Yield not, to stand before me I lay motionless While the raging sea Of life Completes my days of which I be. Turbulence renders its stay I will not submit; Encouraging words come into play PLEASE don’t let them take her away! Vickie Skowronski ~ Copyright 1993

LOST I couldn’t be myself anymore Not to laugh Not to cry Not to share I had to be hardened Under the rage of the past. I had to forget how I felt I had to forget what I liked and what I needed To do this in the name of love. I had to forget That God loved me just as I was And that I didn’t have to please anyone but myself and Him who put me here I plead to come back, to shed the fears and remember mostly that what I feel and need are important, to be tender is OK, not an embarrassment. I want to be freed! Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright Aug 1998

The Perfect Gift I can recall the Christmas eves When Dad was still on Earth When Christmas time was family time And a celebration of Christ’s Birth. My heart and soul were ripped apart The year that Daddy died Gone was the family I thought I had All I had left to do was cry. I knew someday with faith and hope I knew “Dad” would return He came back in a friendly smile From a good friend, I would learn. You brought to me the perfect gift It’s not under the tree It’s not a gift I can unwrap You brought my “family” back to me. Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright Dec 2000

To Know the Truth Imprisoned by the past Empowered by the pain To look in the mirror To think you’re insane Cannot I look forward To see that it’s true There’s good with the bad I’ve heard that from you So now to begin The process of healing To look at my life To know what I’m feeling Unlock the dungeon Open the door Frightened, but hopeful Deny myself no more Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 1997

For Real When I say that I love you Do not be afraid For the love that I feel Does not trap or enslave It’s a love made of freedom That allows us to be The best kind of people God meant us to be From the moment that I met you I knew you’d be my friend No matter where you go, or what you do I’ll love you to the end. So, do not be afraid, my friend When I say I love you so I know you are a gift from God I needed you to know! Vickie Skowronski ~September 2000

FOR JEREMY The moment that I saw your face And touched your little hand I knew the person you’d become When you got to be a man. I knew you’d have a character Of strength and dignity You added your own humor Which is very fine with me! I saw your sensitivity And how you’d help a friend, Your loyalty was strong and true I knew it would never end. I watched you be an athlete, And an actor, and a guide, It didn’t matter what you did, You always reached the sky! And then the day would have to come The day I’d dread to see~ You packed your things, Got in your truck And moved to Milwaukee! Oh, Son, then years have just raced by I guess I knew they would~ I want you to know just how proud of you I am~ If you didn’t know, you should! Love, Mom ~December 2001

JESSICA The sun reflects your golden hair There’s fire in your eyes, You have a certain zest for life That others may despise. When you were very little I knew you had a dream~ To not take life for granted To hold on to self esteem. You made it seem so easy Your beauty shone right through, Not only in appearance But your heart inside of you. You have so much to offer You are a shining star~ Your mother is so proud of you Don’t change the way you are! Love, Mom ~December 2001

Too Bad Too bad you did not know me Before I became my illness Before you saw how hard I work Or how I raised three children with love and grace Or that I am loved by my Lord Too bad you never knew the “me” my family and friends knew and loved Vickie Skowronski ~Copyright 2006

Behind the Mask Oh, pardon the man behind the mask He is the one always doing tasks Façade will carry him for a way But he will be exposed one day He smiles always, fooling all From anyone that see’s him fall Reality hides inside his heart He hopes that no one gets too smart To see the pain he hides inside ‘Cause if they did, he’d act surprised Forgive him, Lord, he means so well But his story he is not to tell The pain can overwhelming be And in his eyes the tears flow free But not in sight can someone tell That he is trapped inside a hell When you see that he is smiling may You please know not to turn away He will not show you the real guy He’ll act like he can touch the sky But, really it’s a chance to fool To hide the tears that fill the pool Don’t let him know his secrets known He’s scared his heart will turn to stone With wonder and a spirit lives To this a person~free to give A caring sentimental man I’ll carry him the best I can

"Facebook Friends" I look at your status come over my screen Each update has meaning to me, I have seen My life has somehow been touched by each post From those I just met, to the ones I love most I know that each person has followed a path That some are so blessed, and some are in wrath But knowing what’s happening now in your space Has made my life fuller by seeing your face A comment, a post, or a joke you do share And because you include me, it shows me you care Some of you touched my life so long ago And others I am blessed as I get better to know This way of connecting with people and friends This Facebook thing is not just a trend It’s a way of maintaining a level of sharing And reminds me I know that these people I’m caring I thank you each friend that has stopped by to say “So what are you going to do with your day?” I know I am happy to share in your posts That knowing you’re out there ~no matter which coast So, I send out my ble

Can It Change? I gotta ask you what’s going on And wonder why this split has upon Come to our world~unrest and war Did all this start a long time before? In1776 a contract wrote Would give us all the right to vote And stand a nation so delighted But, if that’s so, why are we not UNITED? Our leader some decisions make May sometimes be a sad mistake But as a nation, can we be UNITED in our LIBERTY? We lose our job, our house, we strife Can’t we be thankful we have LIFE? Is greed consuming heart and mind That people have become unkind? A Pollyanna I am not If you think I care about what I’ve got ‘Cause life is more than money or things We’re materialistic marionettes on strings My friends cannot come home from this war Because more battles they’re needed there for But we complain about our fancy cars While war has someone’s child behind bars Can we UNITE as this country planned? Can we do what’s right and take a stand? Can we share

Fear Not, Little One The time has come, my Little One For you to venture out into The world where you can touch the sun To show that world the “real” you. Let growing be your best defense Each day you live and learn For with each days experience Show you many ways to turn I know within my heart of hearts That you have the wings to fly But as a mother stops and starts I do forget to let you try Please don’t forget, my young one The times I dried away your tears And as I search this empty heart And try to hide my fears That you know longer need me That my job on earth is through The more I try to understand My purpose ~ that was you! With each moment, thinking back, I recognize your need To set you on life’s journey And I know that you’ll succeed I hope that you’ll remember That I tried to do my best And as life passes by me It’s to this I can attest I tried to be a mother And a teacher, and a friend But now I set you off to fly Best wis

A Missing Star  Where did I hide these memories so long  I always put a mask that made me seem strong  I know that the day that you made me your “friend”  Those deep hidden memories just can’t seem to end  I remember the eyes of a guy ocean blue  But inside those eyes showed a soul broke in two  The wit and the humor that covered the pain  And when our eyes met, you need not explain  I knew that your actions ~ a way to protect  The painful reminders that none could detect  But blessed by my challenges, I could beyond  See something was haunting you ~ that we had a bond  Why could I not figure this out way back then  My guess ~ I was trapped in my own swallowing den  I know had I not been so timid and shy  I could have reached out and at least asked you why  You lived in a shadow of loss and you turned  To acceptance of trouble ~ but quickly you learned  That you had the option to turn it around  And soon you found hope and opp

I believe that summer is finally here! People are out and about....enjoying the sunny days and moonlit nights..... I approach each day with passion and faith in my Creator..... without Him, I stand alone..... without Him, I cannot be me...... Tomorrow will come if it shall, and I will rejoice and give thanks.....I have found a place where I belong.....and look forward to each moment that positive energy comes into my heart and soul. Good Night!

ISOLATION If something that I do or say Can somehow ruin someone’s day Perhaps it’s time to step aside And in my world I’ll stay inside With good intentions I do try To be a friend, to learn ~ but why? Does every time a life I touch Mean I am evil ~ lives I crush I love to make a little laugh By something that I say off path But if those words can hurt someone I need to realize I am not fun I look at what I thought I was And any good I did, because I do not think that people see That “funny” is a part of me So people I have hurt, please know I pray that you will let it go Forgive me for mistakes I’ve made And in my mind I’ll always pay For hurting words that were not meant For any person’s life ~I repent I wish that I could take it back And know that only good I smack I will now crawl back in my hole And hope that you can see my goal I never meant to hurt a fly Somehow I do ~I need ask why? ~Vickie Skowronski 27 June, 2009 Copyright 2009

YOU “GET” ME! A DEDICATION It seems to me that I’ve been made To create and share, be unafraid But why do people see me strange And always try to rearrange The parts of me that are unique Suspicious of my motives, freak When all I wish to gain is for My friends to see what I adore That love and friendship IS my life That I can be there through the strife I want to reach the hearts of man To help share peace the best I can I always wondered why I seemed So different from some lives I screamed I only knew it seemed unfair That being me made people stare Then for so long I’d hide my face So I could hide, and not embrace The gifts that made me different hid Was I ashamed of the life I lived? As I reflect on that frightened child Who felt so deep, and loved so wild My life, I took it seriously And hoped that others too could see That though my thoughts were so intense I stil

BASIC HUMAN KINDNESS With open eyes the truth I see The favorite word to us is “me”. What happened to the human breed The selfishness and excess greed Oh, sure there are a certain bunch Some caring people have a hunch But turn the news on late today And hear how greed can ruin the way We care about our fellow man And give of ourselves when we can To see the mocking of what’s unknown When your only focus is you alone If lack of compassion has crippled you, see Then what do you offer our history? To share a part of us for the good Yes, we can do it~ YES, we should! When good times get tough And the economy‘s been rough Can‘t we see how we’re blessed And put faith in the rest We need to remember the basics of life And conquer the greed that causes this strife Can we turn back the clock to a simpler time? And help out a neighbor~not wanting a dime? I may be a dreamer~ not having a clue Or maybe by dreaming, I have hope for

CONFESSION I know that I took a chance Sharing with you My life was enhanced When I gave my heart to you My feelings were spoken And wore upon my sleeve My heart cannot be broken My love cannot deceive I trusted my heart When I knew I did fear That I really do love you And cherish so dear But, taking my heart To wear on my sleeve Has left me to wonder If I can believe If love is not shared It is not love at all If I knew that you cared You’d catch me when I fall As strong as I seem It’s my heart that can break It’s my eyes that will gleam And my love will forsake When I look through your eyes And your soul I look deep I trust that you love me It’s with faith that I leap No walls will stand between us Exposed for you to see Deepest feelings will discuss I throw away the key Vulnerable and forsaken Myself to you I give You know my heart you’ve taken This love for you I live. ~Vickie Skowronski

To Believe I awaken suddenly To this fresh smell of tweed It's how I would picture you going to read, And teach all the students so knowledgeably Your friendship- has blessed my life by God's word So much that you push me to feel self assured Although we've only met one dreary morn Your spirit touched my life which was torn You are smart in so many ways But you go far beyond what's in your days You are loyal, gifted and faithful. I say So here is my gift to you this day. I'm sure the lives you touch With your knowledge, faith- so much How can I help the way I feel? When I know that God made you real And my heart can feel as it does For I know what I see because Of hours of time just chatting ever I met a friend I hope forever Life has blessed me- yes it did Thank you God...for this friend I cannot rid Thank you so, you've touched my life You taught me that I need not strife That God does not make junk, tell me more Can I ever fo

WHY???? Why do you forget when you look at my face That inside there’s a heart and my soul has a place That when you are done playing games with my mind You say all the right words I think that are kind If you were to find out about the person I hide I’m trusting, and loving, and able inside Do you know how it hurts when you look right through me? As I look in your eyes, is it pain that you see? I took that your interest in me was to heart I felt we connected right from the start But here I am feeling that you don’t really see That my heart and my soul is the best part of me! Sometimes when I see men look at me It’s not my heart, soul, or mind they see As hurt surrounds my weary heart Perhaps this is a place to start But never will my soul I share Unless a heart can truly care The pain has left some heavy scars On me- the one who could touch the stars My sheltered heart-preserve I will From unkind hearts who make it still I shut the door and lost the key Will someone bring it back to m

A Place Where I Can Be Myself In the hustle and bustle Of life’s passing dreams Succumbing to somebody’s Wishes it seems There’s a place I can go Where I know I can be, A place where I know It’s ok to be me. Our lives become molds Of the people around us. Always pleasing the lives Of those that surround us. But, somewhere deep inside There’s a voice that seems to say, There’s a place that I can go When I need to get away. From expectations and from strife Or just to spend the day, This place is with my friend Who accepts me just this way! ~Vickie Skowronski~ Copyright 2001

Twist! I wasn't believing The things that I heard. You sparkled like diamonds in actions and words. But, somewhere, at some moment when I turned around to see I turned back around and knew this could not be! You weren't you at all Neither trusting or the same as you made me to believe Now, I didn't even know your name! I am on my own again, it was really hard at first but if you really weren't real I know now it would have been the worst! Vickie Skowronski Copyright ©2008 Vickie Skowronski

FOR LOVE If you think I won’t be there In good times and in bad To share all of the love My heart has ever had To be there for you When you’re home or when you are away You’ll soon learn that I’m real Like you met me that day Since the first day that we met Not a day has gone past That I knew we had something I believe will forever last To see down into your soul When I look in your eyes Then my heart just skips a beat To me it’s no surprise You see, I never did believe That love comes at first sight Until I met an angel One Saturday’s first light Your hands so tender touch Your lips so warm and sweet Your kindness and compassion Have made me feel complete As if when we’re together The two of us makes one Like God had man intended When he warmed us with the sun I feel so blessed to know you And know my heart cannot deny That we are one in His spirit And my love will never die My only hope is knowing That my heart knows you are true But rest assured it does not change How much that I lo

I Suddenly Realized What matters in life is just to be true To the person you are, and the things that you do So today I ask simply ~ Lord, show me Your light And I opened my heart to His word to take flight Life presents challenges day after day Some days will be better than others, but pray For injustice and troubles so real in our life Let’s all work together and surrender our strife I learned long ago that the happiness craved Has nothing to do with possessions I saved That the love of the Savior, a promise I savor I move onward to live a life He will favor Do we look at our blessings, and wonder in fear Or reach in our hearts to our Savior, so dear Is comfort on earth the thing that we crave? Or a promise from Jesus ~our souls He will save I hear in His words, and I feel in my heart That healing I know is a good place to start I can’t be ashamed for what life brought my way I just count my blessings, and worship each day I know that as long as I follow His rule And if even to man,

ELIZABETH’S GRANDPA How can I describe him when she asks? The kindness, the forgiveness How he strived for togetherness The overwhelming carefulness He showed in each one of his tasks. What can I tell her about his life? The way he scrimped and saved My piano playing that he raved The passage for my life that he paved How we always survived any strife. Why do I want her to know about him? The strength and integrity I believed How humility and optimism were conceived The abundance of love that I received How his selfless manner never grew dim. What can I tell her when she wants to know? The reasons that he died How I grieved and how I cried The way I stood by his side How I didn’t want him to go. ~Vickie Skowronski Copyright 1995